Vivian's jaundice is noticeably decreased today, and she's been eating well considering how much sleeping she's done. There's still a good amount of pain being managed with medications. She slept for 7 hours last night with no complaints, so we know some of the pain is probably brought on more by anxiety than anything else. It seems to be a constant battle lately to make sure she gets enough meds to not be miserable but not too much to make her completely loopy. This afternoon Serge and I made our way to a local funeral home to start making arrangements for mom. She is staying involved in the decisions around this task as well, which feels morbid and reassuring all at the same time.
We want to make sure everyone is on the same page here - Vivian's cancer is not curable. All the measures we have taken lately, including hospice, have been purely to relieve pain and make her more comfortable. If the ERCP had not been successful her liver would have completely failed in a few days. It was a life-threatening situation. Now that her liver has been patched up there will be something else that creates a complication that may or may not be treatable. We know this and Vivian knows this. We're not trying to get anyone down, but to keep things realistic. Vivian wanted to try the ERCP again (after an initial failed attempt) to make sure she had a bit more time to tie up some loose ends. Fortunately she now has that time.
Everyone has been so wonderful, kind, and giving of their time and energy over the past week that it is hard for us to ask this of you. For the next four days (Th, F, Sa, Su) we are asking for a hiatus from visits and phone calls to the house. Serge and Vivian will be working through a lot of paperwork together and making some final decisions. We have a lot of family coming by this weekend as well who would like to have some time to visit with Vivian. If you need to get through to us please do so through my cell phone, my sister's cell phone, or my dad's cell phone. I will do my best to keep this blog updated so no one will be left in the dark as to her condition. Please continue to leave comments and words of encouragement - the entire family loves seeing them! Thanks and love to all.
Vivian was diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer on January 6th 2012. She immediately started chemotherapy and along with some pain management started feeling better. At the end of March she started having severe abdominal pain. New scans revealed that tumors had spread throughout her liver and pancreas. That's where this blog picks up. Vivian passed away on April 26th, 2012.
We are thinking of all of you great people love you all SCHILLIO's from the west
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update....we do appreciate it a great deal. Love and hugs to all of you.
ReplyDeleteThe Sekeraks
Thinking of you Viv and family and sending prayers for strength, healing,comfort many times a day. I think of all the good times, the laughter we shared in BH over the years and how much of it you provided. I have been wearing my TIBS pin that you and Lin made to get us thru a few of those last few years and that's just how I feel about all this suffering you and your family and us, your friends have to go thru. THIS IS BULLSHIT. I know I'm supposed to be grateful, and mature and find the positive but right now I'm just too hurt and angry and pissed at this monster of a disease that keeps on taking from you and hence the rest of us. Okay now that I've cheered ever one up.... Love to everyone Di
ReplyDeleteThanks Di for putting into words what I am sure all of us who know and love Viv (and the family) feel.
DeleteNancy
I remember those buttons as well as the mischievous look on Vivian's face as she proudly showed them off :) Great memories!
DeleteStacy
Feel our love, Schillios......
ReplyDeleteGretchen
I can't thank Paul enough for doing this blog. It gives us all piece of mind during this difficult time. Know you are all in my thoughts and prayers. Love to you all!
ReplyDeleteStacy
You are all so brave and working so hard to take such good care of mom/Vivian! Keep the blog going as it is comforting to know how Vivian and all of you are doing. Thinking about you all so often day and night. Barb
ReplyDeleteDi put into words what many have held back saying. Thank God that the love and memories are stronger than the hurt and anger.
ReplyDeleteThank you for keeping us so clearly informed. This is sent with prayers for all of you. Justine
I echo the thanks of others regarding the creation of this blog. Please let Vivian know how many times I have been thinking of her and remember all of great adventures as our families grew. My prayers are with you guys, and my heart is sad. There is no one I know who good help me see the bright side of life when I was down or make me laugh,than Vivian. I am so glad to hear this part of her spirit is still shining through.
ReplyDeletePeggy
Thanks for the update on Vivian. I have been thinking about all of you and am glad to know that she has been feeling better.
ReplyDeleteHeayoung
I am not sure your mother remembers me. I was a special needs aide for a kindergarden student named Veronica. I was so impressed with how your mother spent time with these children to help them with there speech.
ReplyDeleteI would like to tell her that I just found out about her condition and I will be praying for all of you!
Val
First off, thank you so much for this blog! It's nice to be able to know whats going on with Vivian.
ReplyDeleteVivian, our thoughts and prayers are with you. I admire your strength during this time. You are such a strong woman!!! I wanted to tell you how much I loved getting to shop with you, Lin and Ann. Helping you shop for makeup was so much fun as well! I will carry the memory of that day with me forever. Thank you so much for allowing me to share that with you ladies.
From the first time I was introduced to you, when Serg had to "milk" DJs cancasore. (Hopefully he never sees that I wrote that on here, but the fact that you can milk a cancasore is still funny to me!) I could see that you were a very loving person who accepted everyone with open arms. I still have our first Christmas decoration you gave us. A beautifully decorated bowl we put candy in. It doesn't stay there of course...
I love your sense of humor as well. And the way you embrace every new encounter. Like having a dance off at our wedding with my sisters and niece to Michael Jacksons "Thriller". All eyes were on you and everyone still talks about it. You "shook your groove thing" and won the dance off! You and Lin also taught me how to dance my first polka!!
Vivian I am just so glad I met you! May God take you and your family in his loving arms and provide you all with peace and strength. We are thinking of you!!!
Much love,
DJ, Nicole and Jake Williamson